A New Day

Last night I was up late reading the book, The White Queen.  While reading it I turned it to A&E and Duck Dynasty was on as my background noise.  I normally do not watch DD but, this one caught my attention.  It was the Christmas episode and they were getting ready to perform the Christmas story.  Which our family was supposed to do but, did not get the opportunity to due to our stupid actions as a family.  

Christmas is a time of family and unfortunately on Christmas Day that night we were at dinner there was a major misunderstanding.  I love my family but, that night I felt the furthest thing from love.  I have PTSD and something my brother-in-law said set me off.  He did not know it would but, what he said and how he said it set off a back-flash.  He could not have predicted that what he did would have done this but, he could have handled the situation with kindness.  I want my B-I-L to know that I love him and if I offended him that it was not meant as to.

Last night though while watching this I heard the sweet small voice of the Holy Ghost.  It told me that I need to contact all my siblings and tell them what I think and that I love them dearly.  I need to step-up as the eldest in my family.  Finally, we need to redo Christmas day, we need to come together for our parents and have Dad read the Christmas story and dress all the kids up and have a great night.  Mom and Dads house can no longer be a battle ground esp since I live in their home and have no where to run.  

I love my family with all my heart and I do not want us to fall apart bc of pride.  So It is time for me to take my place and express my feeling and pray that my sisters hear me and we can come together as one.